Common Courtesy

What happened to the day when people treated each other with respect and courtesy?  When did people stop teaching their children to treat their elders with respect?  Simple things like referring to our elders with terms like sir and ma'am.  Opening doors not only for women but, for elderly people as well.  I was taught as many of my friend were that we must treat everybody with respect especially if we wanted respect as well.  Courtesy was the greatest form of respect you could show any body. 

I was brought up calling my friends parents Mr. or Mrs. whatever.  My bosses and elders were always sir and ma'am.  When my daughters friends ask me my name I always say Mr. Burns.  They always seem confused by that.  I have friends that I still don't know what theirs parents first name is.  I always called my bosses Mr., Mrs. or Ms when addressing them formally and sir and ma'am when addressing them informally.  On request I would call my bosses or friends parents by first name.  I always treated them with respect.  The respect due their station in life.  This along with the rule of don't speak unless spoken to in the presence of elders and superiors has always served me well.  I am well thought of and respected among my peers and superiors.

It seems to me that courtesy has gone by the way side by generations following.  Many younger people want to refer to elders and superiors by first name without getting permission first.  Very few young adults have sir and ma'am in their vocabulary unless they are from a military background.  Simple courtesies like opening doors or addressing elders with Mr., Mrs. or Ms. are not ingrained in them.  Showing respect for elders is not a given anymore, children are being taught that respect must be earned by others and that they should expect respect from others. This is an oxymoron perpetrated by parents to give children a basis of self respect. 

My thought is this:  Children should be taught to earn the respect of their elders and peers by being courteous and respectful.  Not expecting respect because that is what they want.  Courtesy is the building block of earning the respect of others.  The golden rule says do unto others as you would have them do unto you.  Not expect other to do unto you because you expect it.